Toni talked about this moment with me, the time when she would die…..she spoke so openly, frankly, freely, always saying she was not afraid of death. And we know why she had no fear….She believed and held onto the promises of Jesus. He filled her with His joy, His abundant life, His hope for tomorrow. Even when she was suffering. We are all witnesses to that.

One day last summer we were talking about my mother’s memorial service. When she heard the remembrances which we shared at the service, she said “Who’s even going to come to my funeral?”……Toni, look here and see all these beautiful faces. I am in awe. You reflect tenderness, caring concern and love. It is awesome. And then she said, “Who’s going to talk about me?” I didn’t want to think about this day, but from my heart I said, “I will, Toni. If God gives me His grace and I am given the opportunity from Ken, I will.” Thank you Ken.

I well remember the first time I met Toni. It was just two weeks after we moved here, in August 2000. I was driving along Trailwood to Wednesday Bible Study, when all of a sudden, in a flash, a car came flying out, front end first, from a driveway. Who was that?!! To my surprise I followed this car to Founders Club and met Toni face to face at Bible Study. I’m so glad we didn’t meet bumper to bumper! I immediately identified her as a true blue, dyed in the wool New Yorker, and wondered if I would enjoy a future friendship with this feisty, petite woman. Little did I know when Toni liked you, she chose to make you her friend, and she held that relationship in the highest esteem.

We shared so many hours of conversation. Toni was never at a loss for words or opinions. She was a great encourager to anyone who would allow her to talk about having cancer. She would even call a stranger or a neighbor as she did with ours when she heard about his diagnosis. She would tell you point blank what you had to do to fight it; just the way she so valiantly did. She lived her life well, with great courage; right up to her calling home to heaven. It was what she prayed for. I thank the Lord for that. Speaking of her heavenly home, I just love the vision I have of Toni getting right down to the business at hand, moving into and decorating her Jesus promised heavenly mansion. This one is going to be better than perfect! Imagine the shopping she’s doing, her favorite pass time. No need for credit cards, and…..she gets to do this for eternity! Ken, I know you’re going to love it……someday.

One thing we found in common immediately was we were always looking for a hairdresser who knew how to give a good haircut. We were both so fussy….a good haircut was really important you know. Toni always looked so perfectly beautiful.

We shared photos of our vacations, stories about our husbands, our children, and especially the newest joys….grandchildren. Oh my goodness, they were the light of her life. She had been actively matchmaking my grandson Joseph with her granddaughter Nicole. Watch out Joe and Danielle, he lives in Deer Park and might come a courting one day…..he’s seen her photo and she’s a cutie. Ken, you meant the world to her. She loved you dearly and desired to spend time with you and please you. What kept her going was her determination to make sure she could provide the things you will need when she is gone…….faith…..church family and good friends. I think she’s done well.

Most of all, our relationship took on sharing the deeper side of life. What’s it all about, you know? What’s this journey we all find ourselves on? What road do we choose? Toni decided it was birth, life, death and everything in between. Faith in our Lord Jesus is what was at the core of our friendship, and we prayed for one another and shared what He was always doing in our lives. I learned her life had a history of many hardships and disappointments, but she always had a positive attitude. I had great respect for her and grew to love her dearly. She called me her angel, a name of which I am so unworthy. I was blessed to be her friend. She fought the good fight, ran the good race, always spoke the truth in love. She was a beautiful, strong vessel, carrying the love of Jesus. His light shined through her beautiful bright eyes.

I’d like to close with words anonymously written that are far more eloquent than mine.

Thank you for this precious opportunity to express my love for Toni and to honor her.

"A death has occurred

And everything is changed by this event.

We are painfully aware

That life can never be the same again.

That yesterday is over,

That relationships once rich have ended.

But there is another way

To look upon this truth.

If life went on the same without the presence of Toni,

We could only conclude that the life

We here remember made no contribution,

Filled no space, meant nothing.

The fact that Toni left behind a place

That cannot be filled,

Is a high tribute to her.

Life can be the same after a trinket has been lost,

But never….after the loss of a treasure."

Please Make Donations To The Following In Toni's Memory:

St. Peters Luthern Church
4843 Southport-Supply Road SE
Southport, NC - 28461

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